When reporting revealed online communities sharing tactics for sexual violence, the existence of that harm should have been enough. Instead, public conversation quickly shifted to minimizing the scale. This reflection explores what that reaction reveals about how we understand, distance ourselves from, and respond to sexual violence.

For many people, safety is not a choice—it is a constant calculation. This article explores how the burden of preventing violence is often placed on those most impacted, and why real prevention requires shifting responsibility away from individuals and toward the behaviors, systems, and norms that allow harm to continue.